I have been coveting a large, glass bowl that usually lives in cardiac rehab downstairs. Those of you know me well and know my love of all things for entertaining and cooking are not surprised by my love for an object like this, however this is not just a normal clunky bowl. This particular bowl goes to live in the department that wins the quarterly customer satisfaction award. We send out a survey to a randomly selected group of patients and get compared to all the other outpatient departments that the hospital has. We keep getting really great scores but are edged out repeatedly by cardiac rehab.
It makes me nuts that we keep losing because the patients in cardiac rehab have just had a near death experience, are generally just happy to be alive, will do ANYTHING to avoid having another heart attack, and are just there to exercise in a pain-free process, drink coffee with their pals(because almost all of them are retired) and never get kicked to the curb because they can just keep coming forever as long as they pay $30 a month. My patients are generally in pain, have not had a life altering experience (read: not nearly as impressed with me and laid back in their approach) and think I have some sort of a magic wand that should heal them instead of hard work, sweat, swearing, and occasionally blood. They either get better super fast or stop getting better all together at which point we have to kick them out against their will generally. I wonder who would get the better satisfaction scores?
I digress. Needless to say the bowl has been something I have wanted since setting foot in Self Regional Healthcare nearly 2 years ago. I had basically given up hope and it had become a running joke between my boss and myself. We had discussed stealing it from cardiac rehab and holding it for ransom, actually beating up the cardiac rehab patients while dressed like cardiac rehab employees, and keying cars in the cardiac rehab parking lot...none seemed like a good, adult way of handling the situation. Then all the sudden last week I get a text from my boss that says "we won the bowl". Any normal person would find that odd, but it was the lilting voice of sweet triumph and "nanny nanny boo boo".
The bowl is usually presented at a big, quarterly meeting of all the managers and administration but as luck would have it(or wouldn't have it), they called off the meeting due to our layoffs and basically just chucked the bowl at my boss at the administration meeting. She told them we were going to take it to the local bar and fill it with beer...like the Stanley Cup. Everyone chuckled at how funny we were, but they don't get what we have been through to get the bowl. I won't get into all of it, but it has been a "pull yourself up by the bootstrap and dust off because there is a lot more shit to do before the sun goes down" kind of situation for sometime for us and there really isn't any light yet. This comes at a great time for us and I am really happy for everyone that works with me because it was a super effort under non-ideal circumstances.
So just know that late one evening, when the moon is high in the South Carolina sky, there is a high possibility that the shiny bowl may go missing ...and a high possibility there might be an incognito gathering at the Worcester's with the world's biggest margarita and a whole crap ton of bendy straws!
Monday, April 27, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Holy Freaking Tornado Batman...
There was tornado craziness last weekend. Friday night there were huge storms. There were a bunch of us at the second floor apartment dying Easter eggs when the sirens started going off. I was the only one who knew anything about tornados so I became the expert. It was interesting to see people from the Northeast react/freak out completely at something that was a part of my normal life growing up.
I went to work the next day and the hospital got a TON of damage. No damage to the structure, but we had some HUGE trees that got uprooted. That was something I hadn't seen before. THe root balls were huge and the trees were just shoved over. I took some pics with my phone and will try to put them on here so you can see. Bizarre that I have had just as many close brushes with tornados here in the past 2 years as I would have at home...
PS: Tree in above photo is the root ball I am fake pushing over below..
Triathlon Season Officially On!
So this is the first installment of the summer triathlon season. Yep, Jake and I will be back out there punishing ourselves in the name of sport and fitness for fun. This season's first tri for Jake and myself was right in our backyard...literally. It was kind of an entire weekend deal as there was a kid's tri on Saturday that Jake and I volunteered with and then we competed today.
The kid's tri was totally hysterical. It was for ages 4-12 of kids and there were everything from kids as big as me to tiny bikes with flames and training wheels. It was set up exactly like a "big person tri", but the bikes couldn't reach the rack and a couple of them couldn't tie their own shoes. They swam two lengths of the pool, changed their clothes, rode their bike for 3 miles, then ran a mile. It was the funniest thing ever. The littlest ones were the best because they were totally clueless. The meat of my job was to make sure everyone got their shoes on, helmet on frontwards, pointed their bike the right direction and then made it back to go out for the run. Those little guys were totally disoriented when coming out of the pool. I stopped one kid from taking off on his bike without a helmet, shoes, or a shirt. I was also informed by a four year old that "I can do it myself" as he refused help and jammed his foot into his socks backwards for the fifth time. His parents totally cracked up and said that was average behavior. My other favorite "average kid behavior" came after the tri. The kid ran across the finish line, snarfed down 2 bananas an orange and a whole thing of gatorade then started running around like crazy. His mom said "how about you come sit down for a sec?" The kid said that he was fine, kept running around, then promptly vomited copiously everywhere. Did I mention this one had a mohawk and was 12... Neat.
The adult tri was this morning. Jake and I were able to ride our bikes to the start which was fun. I also got to use my new and fantastically awesome backpack and red flashing "don't hit me light". DORK O RIFFIC! I also had some great new goggles and had added earplugs to the repetorie to keep the water out of my ears and I was set! Let the fun begin. HEY-O!
The swim was not too bad. It was short which is always good, but it was cold outside of the pool for sure when we got out. They chlorinate the SNOT out of the YMCA pool so I smelled like I was sweating bleach during the bike and run. I was out of the pool in just over 6 minutes which was what I wanted. The bike was COLD...maybe becasue I was wearing a tank top and bike shorts that were wet and it was 53 degrees outside...and I was riding a bike 18 mph. I got through that in around 41 minutes. The run was my best EVER in a triathlon at 30 minutes and 9 seconds...crappy 9 seconds. All together my time was 1:21.09. It was fun because that was good enough for 2nd place in my age group! Yeah! The bag that was the prize is pretty non-crappy too so that is fun.
The best part is that we then went to IHOP for breakfast. It is kind of a tradition with Jake and I...a really delicious one. Tonight we are going to go see a movie and dinner with some pals. Not a bad weekend!
The kid's tri was totally hysterical. It was for ages 4-12 of kids and there were everything from kids as big as me to tiny bikes with flames and training wheels. It was set up exactly like a "big person tri", but the bikes couldn't reach the rack and a couple of them couldn't tie their own shoes. They swam two lengths of the pool, changed their clothes, rode their bike for 3 miles, then ran a mile. It was the funniest thing ever. The littlest ones were the best because they were totally clueless. The meat of my job was to make sure everyone got their shoes on, helmet on frontwards, pointed their bike the right direction and then made it back to go out for the run. Those little guys were totally disoriented when coming out of the pool. I stopped one kid from taking off on his bike without a helmet, shoes, or a shirt. I was also informed by a four year old that "I can do it myself" as he refused help and jammed his foot into his socks backwards for the fifth time. His parents totally cracked up and said that was average behavior. My other favorite "average kid behavior" came after the tri. The kid ran across the finish line, snarfed down 2 bananas an orange and a whole thing of gatorade then started running around like crazy. His mom said "how about you come sit down for a sec?" The kid said that he was fine, kept running around, then promptly vomited copiously everywhere. Did I mention this one had a mohawk and was 12... Neat.
The adult tri was this morning. Jake and I were able to ride our bikes to the start which was fun. I also got to use my new and fantastically awesome backpack and red flashing "don't hit me light". DORK O RIFFIC! I also had some great new goggles and had added earplugs to the repetorie to keep the water out of my ears and I was set! Let the fun begin. HEY-O!
The swim was not too bad. It was short which is always good, but it was cold outside of the pool for sure when we got out. They chlorinate the SNOT out of the YMCA pool so I smelled like I was sweating bleach during the bike and run. I was out of the pool in just over 6 minutes which was what I wanted. The bike was COLD...maybe becasue I was wearing a tank top and bike shorts that were wet and it was 53 degrees outside...and I was riding a bike 18 mph. I got through that in around 41 minutes. The run was my best EVER in a triathlon at 30 minutes and 9 seconds...crappy 9 seconds. All together my time was 1:21.09. It was fun because that was good enough for 2nd place in my age group! Yeah! The bag that was the prize is pretty non-crappy too so that is fun.
The best part is that we then went to IHOP for breakfast. It is kind of a tradition with Jake and I...a really delicious one. Tonight we are going to go see a movie and dinner with some pals. Not a bad weekend!
Sunday, April 5, 2009
March in the Rearview Mirror
So March got away from me pretty badly. So here is my attempt to update.
Work got complicated this month. The economy slowing down was rough on this area, which tends to struggle a little anyway. We ended up needing to layoff around 200 people. I didn't have to lay off anyone that works directly for me, but we are down 3 support staff which is going to be a real challenge. They did a great job taking care of odds and ends for us that were really time consuming activities (that I hate) like faxing, filing, and calling offices. We are going to have to make some changes and be more efficient (a word I am starting to hate) with our time, but I know it won't adversely effect our patients. Just another good life challenge.
My self defense class is wrapping up this next week and it has been a really fun experience. I will just suggest that no one sneaks up on me anymore...unless you want to see what $75 buys you in the way of self defense education. Which leads me to the story about how I got my first black eye. Yep, I was a 30 year old, professional woman with a purple eye that made me resemble "Sloth" from the Goonies movie. My patients loved it. They love the idea of me undergoing any sort of pain or torture. They really feel like it is the their way of vicariously getting their revenge on me through the universe for the 90 bar squats I made them do the day before. Anyway, I was wrestling Jake for the clicker to the TV (yes, wrestling because Jake is smarter than me with words and he always wins the argument regardless of the topic) and hearkened back to my self defense training and jabbed him in the ribs something serious, at which point he yanked his head back and nailed me right in the right eye. It was not awesome...or it was. Depends on what team you are cheering for.
Ike was sporting some sort of rash on his stomach for the past week or two so I had Jake take him to the vet. I thought he was just allergic to something so I had been feeding him Benedryll. But the Benedryll wasn't phasing it. Turns out the "rash" was actually a staph infection on his stomach and we were just bad pet owners. The staph wasn't just staph though. The "rash" was recurrent from every time he went to the dog camp when we went out of town. So the vet runs a thyroid test and sees that he actually has hypothyroidism that is repressing his immune system allowing him to pick up all sort of bacteria that is usually not harmful. The vet assured us that the anti-biotic will clear up the rash, and that the thyroxine will manage his thyroid levels..and should help "perk him up". Apparently he has been lethargic. That scares me. So now I have to feed him four pills a day for the next two weeks...which shouldn't be a big deal but now he is suddenly very observant. He can spot a lump in a piece of cheese, a glimmer of blue in a chunk of peanut butter and is heavily scrutinizing everything that is going into his mouth for the first time in his life. Someone told me to just shove it in his mouth, hold his mouth closed and blow in his face...that would lead to my next black eye very quickly. Whoever came up with that idea does not have an 85 pound dog that is overly paranoid and freakishly strong.
So there is my little update. I am headed over to a co-workers to help her put her garden together. I enjoy a little manual labor when I can start and quit whenever I want. Awesome!
Work got complicated this month. The economy slowing down was rough on this area, which tends to struggle a little anyway. We ended up needing to layoff around 200 people. I didn't have to lay off anyone that works directly for me, but we are down 3 support staff which is going to be a real challenge. They did a great job taking care of odds and ends for us that were really time consuming activities (that I hate) like faxing, filing, and calling offices. We are going to have to make some changes and be more efficient (a word I am starting to hate) with our time, but I know it won't adversely effect our patients. Just another good life challenge.
My self defense class is wrapping up this next week and it has been a really fun experience. I will just suggest that no one sneaks up on me anymore...unless you want to see what $75 buys you in the way of self defense education. Which leads me to the story about how I got my first black eye. Yep, I was a 30 year old, professional woman with a purple eye that made me resemble "Sloth" from the Goonies movie. My patients loved it. They love the idea of me undergoing any sort of pain or torture. They really feel like it is the their way of vicariously getting their revenge on me through the universe for the 90 bar squats I made them do the day before. Anyway, I was wrestling Jake for the clicker to the TV (yes, wrestling because Jake is smarter than me with words and he always wins the argument regardless of the topic) and hearkened back to my self defense training and jabbed him in the ribs something serious, at which point he yanked his head back and nailed me right in the right eye. It was not awesome...or it was. Depends on what team you are cheering for.
Ike was sporting some sort of rash on his stomach for the past week or two so I had Jake take him to the vet. I thought he was just allergic to something so I had been feeding him Benedryll. But the Benedryll wasn't phasing it. Turns out the "rash" was actually a staph infection on his stomach and we were just bad pet owners. The staph wasn't just staph though. The "rash" was recurrent from every time he went to the dog camp when we went out of town. So the vet runs a thyroid test and sees that he actually has hypothyroidism that is repressing his immune system allowing him to pick up all sort of bacteria that is usually not harmful. The vet assured us that the anti-biotic will clear up the rash, and that the thyroxine will manage his thyroid levels..and should help "perk him up". Apparently he has been lethargic. That scares me. So now I have to feed him four pills a day for the next two weeks...which shouldn't be a big deal but now he is suddenly very observant. He can spot a lump in a piece of cheese, a glimmer of blue in a chunk of peanut butter and is heavily scrutinizing everything that is going into his mouth for the first time in his life. Someone told me to just shove it in his mouth, hold his mouth closed and blow in his face...that would lead to my next black eye very quickly. Whoever came up with that idea does not have an 85 pound dog that is overly paranoid and freakishly strong.
So there is my little update. I am headed over to a co-workers to help her put her garden together. I enjoy a little manual labor when I can start and quit whenever I want. Awesome!
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Southern Snow
It snowed last Sunday. A lot. Like giant, wet flakes. Everyone here was really keyed up and excited. Not me. I was mad. I didn't move this far away from Kansas to have it snow on March 1st. Seriously.
An Ode to "Fake Patty's Day"
I suppose an "ode" is actually a poem. I stink at poetry but still wanted the title to have "ode" in it, so this is what you are stuck with.
One of the things I really miss about Manhattan is "Fake Patrick's Day" which is occurring this weekend. It is a manufactured holiday that is frivolous, but still a good time (much like Valentine's Day..c'mon ladies, you know it is) . It was thrown together by the Aggieville bar mafia 5-10 years ago as the very liquor lucrative St. Patrick's Day was falling on Spring Break and stealing away all of their profits...hmm, how can they solve this. "Oh, let's just move everything for St. Patrick's Day up a weekend. Maybe no one will notice." We noticed...and we thought it was a great idea. There is a parade, a fun run and everyone wears green. You would seriously thinks it was St. Patty's Day for real, but the best part is that you get to celebrate again the next weekend if you are around Manhattan and didn't go anywhere for Spring Break...or you are an adult. Manhattan is a magical place.
Although Fake St. Patty's Day has an evil side too. Your husband can be out of town, you can spend hours in the Loo (totally unacceptable for an adult) drinking green beer, get take out from Texas Star and eat it in your neighbor's yard on the way home after "taking a nap" in their yard. That's just hypothetical... Good news is that you get a re-do the next weekend if you screwed it up. Life needs more days like that. Fact.
One of the things I really miss about Manhattan is "Fake Patrick's Day" which is occurring this weekend. It is a manufactured holiday that is frivolous, but still a good time (much like Valentine's Day..c'mon ladies, you know it is) . It was thrown together by the Aggieville bar mafia 5-10 years ago as the very liquor lucrative St. Patrick's Day was falling on Spring Break and stealing away all of their profits...hmm, how can they solve this. "Oh, let's just move everything for St. Patrick's Day up a weekend. Maybe no one will notice." We noticed...and we thought it was a great idea. There is a parade, a fun run and everyone wears green. You would seriously thinks it was St. Patty's Day for real, but the best part is that you get to celebrate again the next weekend if you are around Manhattan and didn't go anywhere for Spring Break...or you are an adult. Manhattan is a magical place.
Although Fake St. Patty's Day has an evil side too. Your husband can be out of town, you can spend hours in the Loo (totally unacceptable for an adult) drinking green beer, get take out from Texas Star and eat it in your neighbor's yard on the way home after "taking a nap" in their yard. That's just hypothetical... Good news is that you get a re-do the next weekend if you screwed it up. Life needs more days like that. Fact.
Monday, February 23, 2009
"You Can't Go Back For The Eyeballs.."
So I am taking Self Defense. It is the most educational and fantastic thing I have ever done for myself. It has been a really empowering to learn how to get out of grips, kick people in the knee in the proper way to ruin their patellar tendon, and elbow them in the head/neck in a way to disable them so that you can escape...and last but not least, gouge out their eyes. I am not kidding. However, I was told that we are only allowed to use "reasonable" force on our attacker. The teacher actually said that we cannot beat the ever loving crap out of the attacker and then go back and gouge out their eyes...like someone has done that...well, actually it does mean that someone has done that or their wouldn't be a warning. We also practiced calling the police and telling them our name, that we were in fear for our lives, and that we may need a lawyer. It was a lot.
Initially I didn't really think I would learn that much. I was totally wrong. A bunch of us go from work to Self Defense and have accidentally kicked the crap out of one another repeatedly. Bruises, joints popping, throat jabbing is just another day at the office over lunch after my peanut butter sandwich.
Today was fun because we got a coupon for mace from a hunting store (they don't sell it at WalMart anymore) and instructions on how to get a concealed weapons permit. Homework is fun.
Initially I didn't really think I would learn that much. I was totally wrong. A bunch of us go from work to Self Defense and have accidentally kicked the crap out of one another repeatedly. Bruises, joints popping, throat jabbing is just another day at the office over lunch after my peanut butter sandwich.
Today was fun because we got a coupon for mace from a hunting store (they don't sell it at WalMart anymore) and instructions on how to get a concealed weapons permit. Homework is fun.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Full Schedule
I left home on Friday morning at 4 a.m. and got back home last night at 12:30 from Colorado. It was some crazy business but tons of fun. I am totally tired but it was an awesome time.
There should be a showering requirement when you buy a plane ticket. I sat by perfectly normal people that just stunk like BO craziness on the two long lengths of my flight. It was intense. I connected through Detroit. The airport was surprisingly nice. I thought "maybe Detroit gets a bad rap", but was promptly informed by other people I traveled with that were from Detroit that the city earns every bad stigma that it has garnered. The new city slogan could be "Detroit, it is as bad as you think".
I got to Denver on Friday morning and Jake and I headed downtown. It's a really interesting place with neat mix of work/shopping/restaurants. You have to keep your head on a swivel because there are buses and trains driving all over the place like crazy. After we checked out LoDo we headed to Fort Collins to meet up with Jake's sister, her boyfriend, Jake's business partner-person, and his wife. It was great to catch up with everyone! I was totally wiped out.
We got up early the next morning and headed to the slopes. The traffic was super nasty but it was worth it to get to the mountain. It was busy but tons of fun. I had a hard time getting going on the skis as everyone warned me a million times to "not break a leg" in SC before I left. I never heard that in KS. Not sure if more South Carolinians break their leg skiing than people from other states, but I was seriously paranoid by Saturday. I was a total wiener. Skiing like a wiener is a lot of hard work. My hips were tired and my calves were on FIRE by the end of the day. I managed not to fall by completely wearing myself out. Jake and I went to a really cool pizza place and couldn't even manage to have a conversation with one another at 7:30 at night because we were so exhausted.
The second day was SO MUCH BETTER. It did help that Jake and I slept for 12 hours on Saturday night. We skied around in the trees and Jake had some awesome wipeouts. It was exhausting for sure. My only wipe out (and the worst wipe out of the weekend) was when I was trying to come to a stop next to Jake on a particularly steep part of the mountain...truth be known, I was actually initially trying to spray him with snow but then realized that I couldn't stop. Poor Jake was under the impression I would stop too....until I took him out at the boots and we landed in a pile of skis and elbows on the side of the hill. It was hysterical.
Ft. Collins was neat. We weren't there very long but it was cool to see. There is a fun progressive/college atmosphere there. It is nice to see where Jake spends some of his time when he is not here. His partner and his family are awesome so it is nice that he has great people to support him.
Flew home late last night. It was great to ship home all of my winter stuff and step off the plane into 54 degrees at 11p.m. I couldn't decide what was better, the skiing or the warmth!
There should be a showering requirement when you buy a plane ticket. I sat by perfectly normal people that just stunk like BO craziness on the two long lengths of my flight. It was intense. I connected through Detroit. The airport was surprisingly nice. I thought "maybe Detroit gets a bad rap", but was promptly informed by other people I traveled with that were from Detroit that the city earns every bad stigma that it has garnered. The new city slogan could be "Detroit, it is as bad as you think".
I got to Denver on Friday morning and Jake and I headed downtown. It's a really interesting place with neat mix of work/shopping/restaurants. You have to keep your head on a swivel because there are buses and trains driving all over the place like crazy. After we checked out LoDo we headed to Fort Collins to meet up with Jake's sister, her boyfriend, Jake's business partner-person, and his wife. It was great to catch up with everyone! I was totally wiped out.
We got up early the next morning and headed to the slopes. The traffic was super nasty but it was worth it to get to the mountain. It was busy but tons of fun. I had a hard time getting going on the skis as everyone warned me a million times to "not break a leg" in SC before I left. I never heard that in KS. Not sure if more South Carolinians break their leg skiing than people from other states, but I was seriously paranoid by Saturday. I was a total wiener. Skiing like a wiener is a lot of hard work. My hips were tired and my calves were on FIRE by the end of the day. I managed not to fall by completely wearing myself out. Jake and I went to a really cool pizza place and couldn't even manage to have a conversation with one another at 7:30 at night because we were so exhausted.
The second day was SO MUCH BETTER. It did help that Jake and I slept for 12 hours on Saturday night. We skied around in the trees and Jake had some awesome wipeouts. It was exhausting for sure. My only wipe out (and the worst wipe out of the weekend) was when I was trying to come to a stop next to Jake on a particularly steep part of the mountain...truth be known, I was actually initially trying to spray him with snow but then realized that I couldn't stop. Poor Jake was under the impression I would stop too....until I took him out at the boots and we landed in a pile of skis and elbows on the side of the hill. It was hysterical.
Ft. Collins was neat. We weren't there very long but it was cool to see. There is a fun progressive/college atmosphere there. It is nice to see where Jake spends some of his time when he is not here. His partner and his family are awesome so it is nice that he has great people to support him.
Flew home late last night. It was great to ship home all of my winter stuff and step off the plane into 54 degrees at 11p.m. I couldn't decide what was better, the skiing or the warmth!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Couch-a-riffic
We got the best couch in the world last week. Not that our other nasty, strange colored, cushion with dog chewed corner that was too uncomforable for words wasn't worth keeping.. It is an indisputable fact that this couch is better. It was on sale, it is the same color as Ike and could be the most fantastic nap couch I have ever been a part of. Yes, even better than the Toll House leather couches of nap fantasticness. If I had any knowledge of how to take a picture of it and post it on here I would. You would all see it wonderfullness even through the internet. No idea how happy a piece of furniture could make me!
Monday, January 12, 2009
So that is what the inside of your toe smells like if it is on fire..
My life is uneventful and fantastically mundane with the exception of my one arch enemy, my right big toenail. I know it does not seem like a formidable foe, but it certainly has been a challenge to the kingdom of "WorkoutLand"...Good god. Anyway, it was time for what has become my annual ingrown toenail surgery when I suggested to my trusty doctor that maybe we just remove the WHOLE toenail just to avoid doing this yearly song and dance. He said "we can if you want to, but look at mine first". He then produced the world's ugliest non-toe nailed toe I have ever seen. Most of the toenail was gone, but two little nubbin toenails were growing on either side of a gigantic crater where the rest of the toenail once was...I actually gasped out loud. Holy Crap. I have seen "nursing home toenail" and this was 15 times worse. He then qualified it by saying, "well he didn't do the best job, but it won't leave much for you to paint". I then pictured seeing my sisters' faces when I show up in the summer wearing sandals (which are really the only shoes I can wear since they don't make size 11.5 in "cute" closed toed shoes) and either A.) painting the crater where the toenail used to reside or B.) wearing a press on toenail..never would work, or C.) saying forget it and going Au Natural with my nasty bi-coastal evil nubbin toenail(S)..they would all freak. I did actually picture their faces and laughed out loud. I don't think the toe-nailless one would look okay even if you airbrushed the Mona Lisa on it and be-dazzled it.
So we carried on with the next best thing. Ablation of the nail bed. Yikes. I have had this freaking menace toenail gouged out of my foot repeatedly and the nail bed scorched with q-tips covered in Phenol that should have killed the entire nail but didn't even phase my prolifically growing toenail. Nothing has worked, so it was time to break out the big guns. No more screwing around. Oh no, this time we were going to cut out the offending party and then stick a electric cauterizing tip down the hole in my foot and actually burn up the nail bed. The nuttiest part is that this was the "better option" and I thanked him for it. All I could envision was my sisters' faces of despair if I went the nubbin toenail route...so I had to try.
I love this doctor. He gets totally excited about anything and will do anything for you. You can show up at his house at midnight if your nose gets broken (it must be set in a hour to avoid surgery..geez), page him in the middle of a run and he will turn right around in his tracks to go back to the hospital, he will do your yearly gynecological visit, burn off a wart or spay your cat...maybe not in that order, but totally not kidding. He apologized during the worst part which were the one million (or two) shots I got in my big toe and complimented me about how tough I must be to have tolerated my terribly evil toenail. He even save the piece he pulled out of my foot. I think it looks a little like Abe Lincoln as it sits on my coffee table ready to gross out my co-workers in the morning. Then he slapped a giant pad on the outside of my leg (ground for the electricity it turns out) and turned up the voltage on some sort of machine and went to work "ablating" my toenail bed.
"Ablating" must come from the French word for "on fire from the inside" because I knew my toe was numb, but it was definitely HOT inside my skin, and I could smell my toe burning..but it didn't really hurt in a normal way. I will tell you that it is not for the faint at heart. Now, I did watch the whole thing with morbid curiosity so that might have helped if I hadn't watched the smoke pour out of my toe....hehehe, there wasn't actual smoke. Meanwhile the good doctor is telling me some story about the time he was doing a vasectomy with the same sort of a tool...and ...I didn't hear the rest because that sounds like a worse idea that sticking the super-electric needle into an open toe nail wound.
So here I sit at home feeling pathetic with my big toe all wrapped up, no exercise for this week and a husband with a boarding pass for a 7 a.m flight tomorrow who is no Florence Nightingale because he just got home from China... and the smell of my burning toenail singed in my nostrils..
So we carried on with the next best thing. Ablation of the nail bed. Yikes. I have had this freaking menace toenail gouged out of my foot repeatedly and the nail bed scorched with q-tips covered in Phenol that should have killed the entire nail but didn't even phase my prolifically growing toenail. Nothing has worked, so it was time to break out the big guns. No more screwing around. Oh no, this time we were going to cut out the offending party and then stick a electric cauterizing tip down the hole in my foot and actually burn up the nail bed. The nuttiest part is that this was the "better option" and I thanked him for it. All I could envision was my sisters' faces of despair if I went the nubbin toenail route...so I had to try.
I love this doctor. He gets totally excited about anything and will do anything for you. You can show up at his house at midnight if your nose gets broken (it must be set in a hour to avoid surgery..geez), page him in the middle of a run and he will turn right around in his tracks to go back to the hospital, he will do your yearly gynecological visit, burn off a wart or spay your cat...maybe not in that order, but totally not kidding. He apologized during the worst part which were the one million (or two) shots I got in my big toe and complimented me about how tough I must be to have tolerated my terribly evil toenail. He even save the piece he pulled out of my foot. I think it looks a little like Abe Lincoln as it sits on my coffee table ready to gross out my co-workers in the morning. Then he slapped a giant pad on the outside of my leg (ground for the electricity it turns out) and turned up the voltage on some sort of machine and went to work "ablating" my toenail bed.
"Ablating" must come from the French word for "on fire from the inside" because I knew my toe was numb, but it was definitely HOT inside my skin, and I could smell my toe burning..but it didn't really hurt in a normal way. I will tell you that it is not for the faint at heart. Now, I did watch the whole thing with morbid curiosity so that might have helped if I hadn't watched the smoke pour out of my toe....hehehe, there wasn't actual smoke. Meanwhile the good doctor is telling me some story about the time he was doing a vasectomy with the same sort of a tool...and ...I didn't hear the rest because that sounds like a worse idea that sticking the super-electric needle into an open toe nail wound.
So here I sit at home feeling pathetic with my big toe all wrapped up, no exercise for this week and a husband with a boarding pass for a 7 a.m flight tomorrow who is no Florence Nightingale because he just got home from China... and the smell of my burning toenail singed in my nostrils..
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
So there you go...
Jake has been traveling quite a bit lately so there have been funny things I have noticed:
1. Jake makes a lot of laundry- I need to buy more underpants and work shirts so that I can have enough to make a full load. I did 2 loads that were 1/3 full. No good...although now that I think of it, less folding and I actually know where everything goes...hmmm
2. Jake makes a lot of dishes- I have had to run a half load lately because I used up all my cereal bowls and coffee mugs. But, Jake is also in charge of putting away the dishes and is quite good at it.
3. Jake eats a lot of food- I made entirely too much spaghetti...like I used up all my Tupperware to store it. There is usually only one little tub of leftovers. I will never eat all of this. What is the mailing address for the starving African children?
4. Jake is great with the remote- Unless there is actually nothing on for real all of the sudden. He always finds something good...or at least watch-able.
4b. Jake is the only one who knows how all of our remote controls work- Criminy. Seriously? I am staring at 5 remotes. Not one of them makes someone come and bring me a snack.
5. I am a terrible relaxer..or Jake is an excellent relaxer- He is the only reason I relax. He is the Master Relaxer, and it is contagious. I am a total nutcase by myself. I will make dust on concrete. I plan how to relax....
This is all probably why I miss him so much when he is gone. Not enough dishes or laundry, nothing on TV (not that I can run the clicker anyway), and I just run around like an idiot until I fall over.
So there you go.
1. Jake makes a lot of laundry- I need to buy more underpants and work shirts so that I can have enough to make a full load. I did 2 loads that were 1/3 full. No good...although now that I think of it, less folding and I actually know where everything goes...hmmm
2. Jake makes a lot of dishes- I have had to run a half load lately because I used up all my cereal bowls and coffee mugs. But, Jake is also in charge of putting away the dishes and is quite good at it.
3. Jake eats a lot of food- I made entirely too much spaghetti...like I used up all my Tupperware to store it. There is usually only one little tub of leftovers. I will never eat all of this. What is the mailing address for the starving African children?
4. Jake is great with the remote- Unless there is actually nothing on for real all of the sudden. He always finds something good...or at least watch-able.
4b. Jake is the only one who knows how all of our remote controls work- Criminy. Seriously? I am staring at 5 remotes. Not one of them makes someone come and bring me a snack.
5. I am a terrible relaxer..or Jake is an excellent relaxer- He is the only reason I relax. He is the Master Relaxer, and it is contagious. I am a total nutcase by myself. I will make dust on concrete. I plan how to relax....
This is all probably why I miss him so much when he is gone. Not enough dishes or laundry, nothing on TV (not that I can run the clicker anyway), and I just run around like an idiot until I fall over.
So there you go.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Christmas Fun
So pretty much this is a great big THANK YOU to everyone who fed us, let us sleep at their house, adjusted their schedules, and went out of their way in any way to make our trip so great! I loved seeing all of you that I spent time with, and am sad that I missed the rest of you that I didn't get to see. We are back to Kansas in June of 2009 for a triathlon in Lawrence so I plan on catching the Eastern part of the state then since we were primarily in the middle to western part of the state this time.
We spent most of our time in Lindsborg and Hill City with a quick stop over in Manhattan overnight for New Years Eve. I hate being this far away from everyone especially around the holidays, but I realized this last time home that I would never normally get to spend that many consecutive days with everyone if we still lived in KS. It would have been a bunch of quick little trips or broken up in some way because of work. Interesting.
Things that made me giggle:
1. Officiating- Jake and his dad got to officiate some basketball games together. I think Jake really enjoyed it. If you happen to get the Hill City paper there is a nearly life sized picture of him and his dad in their referee gear ready to get to work. It was fun to watch them work together as Jake's dad is a very laid back official and Jake is a crazy high strung one. Hysterical. I also got to eat the world's most delicious yet bizarre beef jerky from the concession stand. It was actually the size of my head and got dug out of a box and handed to me with a little sheet of waxed paper. Very lady like and fantastic.
2. Windmills- If you don't ever drive out on I-70 past Salina you won't have any idea what I am talking about. I will do my best to explain it. Envision GIANT windmills stretched as far as the eye can see over the windy pasture land. There. Hard to explain why it is so amazing unless you see it. If you haven't seen it get out there and take a look. It's probably one of the coolest things I have ever seen...and confirms that Kansas is STUPID windy.
3. M&M butt- I was rearranging some things in my back pack on the way to the airport when we were leaving and decided to eat some chex mix. Apparently at some point between Abilene and Gypsum I dropped a M&M onto the car seat. So I spent the next 100 miles warming up the M&M with my rear end and smearing it into my seat and my "seat". I got out at the airport and found the train wreck on the rental car seat. Folks in Wichita, Memphis and Greenville airports got to try and solve the mystery of "what is on that lady's rear end?"
Anyway, I left out a million stories and fun moments but I am tired and those are the ones that stick out tonight! Hope you all had an excellent holiday season and are doing well in this first week of 2009. Again I want to thank each of you for everything!
We spent most of our time in Lindsborg and Hill City with a quick stop over in Manhattan overnight for New Years Eve. I hate being this far away from everyone especially around the holidays, but I realized this last time home that I would never normally get to spend that many consecutive days with everyone if we still lived in KS. It would have been a bunch of quick little trips or broken up in some way because of work. Interesting.
Things that made me giggle:
1. Officiating- Jake and his dad got to officiate some basketball games together. I think Jake really enjoyed it. If you happen to get the Hill City paper there is a nearly life sized picture of him and his dad in their referee gear ready to get to work. It was fun to watch them work together as Jake's dad is a very laid back official and Jake is a crazy high strung one. Hysterical. I also got to eat the world's most delicious yet bizarre beef jerky from the concession stand. It was actually the size of my head and got dug out of a box and handed to me with a little sheet of waxed paper. Very lady like and fantastic.
2. Windmills- If you don't ever drive out on I-70 past Salina you won't have any idea what I am talking about. I will do my best to explain it. Envision GIANT windmills stretched as far as the eye can see over the windy pasture land. There. Hard to explain why it is so amazing unless you see it. If you haven't seen it get out there and take a look. It's probably one of the coolest things I have ever seen...and confirms that Kansas is STUPID windy.
3. M&M butt- I was rearranging some things in my back pack on the way to the airport when we were leaving and decided to eat some chex mix. Apparently at some point between Abilene and Gypsum I dropped a M&M onto the car seat. So I spent the next 100 miles warming up the M&M with my rear end and smearing it into my seat and my "seat". I got out at the airport and found the train wreck on the rental car seat. Folks in Wichita, Memphis and Greenville airports got to try and solve the mystery of "what is on that lady's rear end?"
Anyway, I left out a million stories and fun moments but I am tired and those are the ones that stick out tonight! Hope you all had an excellent holiday season and are doing well in this first week of 2009. Again I want to thank each of you for everything!
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Ready.
Getting excited to head towards the frosty Midwest later this week! I am really looking forward to it. We are going to be in Lindsborg and Hill City primarily with a quick trip to Manhattan. It cracks me up that our idea of a relaxing vacation is driving all over the state! Oh well. It always is a great time and awesome to see everyone.
I am a little stressed about the christmas gifts I bought. None of them will be in my hands prior to our arrival in Kansas. They were all sent to my parents. Hope they are all there...hope I can remember what should be there.
Hope everyone is having a lovely holiday season! See some of you very soon!
I am a little stressed about the christmas gifts I bought. None of them will be in my hands prior to our arrival in Kansas. They were all sent to my parents. Hope they are all there...hope I can remember what should be there.
Hope everyone is having a lovely holiday season! See some of you very soon!
Monday, December 1, 2008
Thanksgiving
We spent our seconds turkey day in the SC last week. Each therapist needs to be around for either Christmas or Thanksgiving and we generally like to take a lot of time around Christmas. There is nothing like being at home for Thanksgiving, but home is not an option from this distance currently so we make the best of the day. We are very lucky to be surrounded by other people that don't have families here and are our friends so it makes for good company!
There were five of us for lunch/dinner and everyone brought different things that they had for their own home Thanksgivings. I was "in charge" of the staples: turkey, potatoes, green bean casserole, dressing, and rolls...and cherry pie. Jake loves cherry pie. I totally despise everything about it. Needless to say it is not an often made creation at our house. It was not a total success but not a total failure. Jake ate the whole pie in about 3 days so it must not have been totally bad.
We had appetizers, played games and before we knew it the turkey was done! Pretty darn good day all around. It was great to spend time with friends and kick back....and eat combinations and amounts of things that have make my stomach a mess for almost 5 straight days now. But I am totally thankful for every miserable, carb fueled moment! Definitely missed all of you, but thought of you guys all throughout my day and was lucky enough to have a few other great folks to surround myself with.
Hope all is well with all of you and you had a great turkey day! Gooble, gobble!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Repression and Avoidance.
Repression and Avoidance. The healthiest way to deal with stress and your feelings.
I have fallen off of the face of the earth lately. Work stuff has been a little rocky(too busy, I don't have all the answers) so I like to crawl in a hole and not talk to anyone until I know all of the answers and have the problems solved. It makes my mom crazy. She is so sensitive and loving and wants to help me and hear my stories...all I want to do is not talk about it and get off of the phone. Unfortunately that is how 3/4 of her daughters are. We don't like to talk about our feelings...or really even have them if at all avoidable. We fast forward through all conflicted parts of movies, change the station to avoid conflict on television, and all only own really crappy hysterical movies with happy endings and no plot. I will admit that I am probably the worst.
We get the channel changing thing from our father. I thought Jake was going to freak out and beat him up when we were at home a few weeks ago. My dad only had one working foot so it wouldn't have been that hard. He wouldn't have been able to run away very fast. I think pity was the only thing that prevented my husband from snatching one of dad's crutches (the only one left after the other blew out of the back of the pickup) and beating dad over the head with it until he gave the clicker up to Jake or vowed to watch an ENTIRE television program, football game, or commercial without changing it to avoid the conflict portion. I think Jake missed three game winning field goals, 5 plot altering conflicts in TV shows, and anything meaningful in general that occurred on TV that day. I just sat on the couch and laughed. It was a really nice afternoon of TV for me!
Anyway, I suppose this is an apology post. To all of you that have left me phone messages without responses, sent e-mails without responses, or just wondered if I fell down a rabbit's hole, I apologize. I am doing my best to catch up this weekend. Tough it out with me..I am sorry..I will be better when I have all the answers again!
I have fallen off of the face of the earth lately. Work stuff has been a little rocky(too busy, I don't have all the answers) so I like to crawl in a hole and not talk to anyone until I know all of the answers and have the problems solved. It makes my mom crazy. She is so sensitive and loving and wants to help me and hear my stories...all I want to do is not talk about it and get off of the phone. Unfortunately that is how 3/4 of her daughters are. We don't like to talk about our feelings...or really even have them if at all avoidable. We fast forward through all conflicted parts of movies, change the station to avoid conflict on television, and all only own really crappy hysterical movies with happy endings and no plot. I will admit that I am probably the worst.
We get the channel changing thing from our father. I thought Jake was going to freak out and beat him up when we were at home a few weeks ago. My dad only had one working foot so it wouldn't have been that hard. He wouldn't have been able to run away very fast. I think pity was the only thing that prevented my husband from snatching one of dad's crutches (the only one left after the other blew out of the back of the pickup) and beating dad over the head with it until he gave the clicker up to Jake or vowed to watch an ENTIRE television program, football game, or commercial without changing it to avoid the conflict portion. I think Jake missed three game winning field goals, 5 plot altering conflicts in TV shows, and anything meaningful in general that occurred on TV that day. I just sat on the couch and laughed. It was a really nice afternoon of TV for me!
Anyway, I suppose this is an apology post. To all of you that have left me phone messages without responses, sent e-mails without responses, or just wondered if I fell down a rabbit's hole, I apologize. I am doing my best to catch up this weekend. Tough it out with me..I am sorry..I will be better when I have all the answers again!
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